It is impossible to write this without a heavy heart. The post for this week was supposed to be about my experiences at FedCon but it’s impossible to separate the convention experience from the loss of a friend.

This year’s con was exhausting on all levels: physically, mentally and emotionally. Spending time with my friends and colleagues was wonderful, as always. And for these moments, I wouldn’t want to miss FedCon for anything in the world. You guys are my nerdy family and I recharge my nerdy batteries when I’m in your presence. <3

But somebody was missing, and was missed sorely. Not only by us but also by the kind people who visited us at our stall. “Where is he? Where is the friendly man with the hat and the beard? Where is Thorsten?” At that time, we knew that Thorsten had been critically ill for almost seven months.

On Sunday, my colleagues Pia Fauerbach, Stefan Wendorf, Reinhard Prahl, Joachim Sohn and I had the honour to join Björn Sülter, Claudia Kern and Christian Humberg on the stage of Saal Beethoven. Together with the audience, we gave a round of applause for Thorsten, praying for a miracle that he may be with us again. I’m not comfortable on a stage in general and in this moment it was even harder. The emotions were almost too much to bear and as a lady in the first row began crying I could barely keep myself together. To this lady, in case you’re reading this: Thank you for your authenticity. It was hard but it showed that we are not alone in our grief.

But at that time, there still was this little spark of hope. I had no idea that would change only hours after the convention. When I was back home, late in the evening past 10 p.m. the news we’ve been dreading came. Thorsten Walch is no longer with us. Thorsten who always had a kind word for everybody, knew so many amazing fandom facts and told us so many unbelievable yet true stories. He was a wonderful person, and I am so grateful to have known him. Grateful for the hours I spent with him and my other friends and colleagues at conventions and grateful for his humour. He touched the lives of so many people, not only with his literary work as an author but mostly and most important with his personality and kindness. My thoughts are with his wife Sabine and his community of friends. May you find strength and comfort in the coming weeks.

Ad astra, Thorsten.